The phone we use, the social media we use is in fact a tool that gives you affirmation. Every message you hear, every bell, every like, every follow, every comment, every game you play where you get rewards. All of it are affirmatios. It’s nature is a tool to give us affirmations. And so while writing this and hitting key moments, I heard messages come through, and eventually, it became quite distracting so I decided to turn it off. Until a thought popped in my mind saying “Well I kind of like the affirmations.” Eventually, I came to realize that in its time, in its place, the tool can be used to affirm the path you are taking.
Now, as in all tools, there are many traps within them. There is the trap of overconsumption, there is the trap of doom scrolling, there is the trap of surviving on the affirmations you receive from the tool. The same goes with writing, I can write the most beautiful words I’ve written to date, and then all of a sudden start cultivating this feeling that I am becoming dependent on the words I write, as if my sense of self is starting to be formed based on the affirmations that I receive through my own writing.
One of the most susceptible traps in the world of creation.
So talking about traps is in and off itself is very trappy. So we may only conclude that where your attention goes creation flows. Dream with care.
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What I notice about these traps I talked about before. The traps you can fall in while using a tool for affirmation. I noticed it extends far beyond just the phone. It extends to when I am playing my flute for example. What I’ve noticed is that the beautiful nature of what I was playing diminished from the moment I had the idea of sharing it. From that moment where I stop playing for myself, that’s when the whole experience becomes duller.
Now, while writing I have become aware of that pattern within my mind, it is as if every action I am doing, I’m doing it for someone else. As if every word I write, every word I read, every thought I have, every discovery I receive, as if I used to do all of that solely for the purpose of sharing that with others and get recognition and affirmation.
Wauw, what a beautiful realization. What a beautiful freeing of space within me; to do things just for me. It used to sound so egoic to me, and now it sounds like I stop doing things for others instead of me. It doesn’t mean I will stop loving to do things for others, it means that everything I do won’t be for others. And now I am starting to understand my self. I am starting to understand my pain body. I am starting to be able to read this from the confusion and hatred and guild driven small self. How beautiful is it to see the same sentence and read it in two whole different forms of understanding. The self used to believed I would be selfish if I would do things for myself. The true me understands that that is exactly the things that gives me joy and opens up space within my experience of self to give more to others, to those I love.
You also feel it in your muscles when you are about to do a thing that is not for you. The strength drops by a lot.
So, how do you share while still doing it for yourself and not out of seeking for validation, approval, and affirmation.
You do it with the intent to grow. to learn, to be open to the wisdom and guidance of others.
Thank you Myra, for teaching me that.